I haven't quite found my footing for Fall yet. We have very little scheduled -- no classes, no music, no sports, no gymnastics, no swimming -- which I kind of like because I want to be conscious of the appeal to over-schedule. But with our wide open days, I'm finding that I feel a bit aimless. It's as if I haven't quite gotten in a groove since we got back from our trip. What DO we do with wide open days every day?
I haven't felt this sense of aimlessness for a long time and am surprised to find it cropping up again now. I feel a low grade anxiety or sense of isolation as I try to piece a day together. Most of my friends have their kids at school the mornings we don't, so the chances of meeting up with them are suddenly gone. And afternoons --4-5:30 or 6 -- are quite short.
Silas, all of the sudden, would really LIKE social interaction. Hanging out with Eden and me doesn't cut it like it used to, or involves his pulling Eden's arm as hard as he can or "falling" on her and smashing her face into the ground.
So, once again, I am feeling my way along and reassessing what is important for our days, for our sanity, for development. Yesterday I made a list of fun places we could go. Today I'm making a list of creative things we could do here. I used to put curriculum together every day -- and it looks like I need to bring a little bit of that energy back to life now.
An aside: as I wrote this, I just watched Eden wander around the living room, pause to look at the cluttered coffee table where there are inviting things like a remote control, roll of tape, and phone charger, ignore all of those things and move in for a dollar bill, saying "MOE-NEE! MOE-NEE!" She then picked up a sharpee (which clearly shouldn't be on that table) and stood there "drawing" (thankfully the top was on) on the dollar. I have now extracted the sharpee, but she still has the dollar... I should add here that her knowledge of the word "money" comes from her grandmother -- thanks mom! -- and is especially embarrassing in a crowded store when the cashier hands me change and my 1 year old starts yelling "moe-nee! moe-nee!"